When I was in school I was afraid of many things. I was afraid of what people thought of me. I was afraid of how people would respond if I acted a certain way or did a certain thing. I was afraid of what would happen if I didn’t succeed. And mostly, I was afraid of talking to girls that I thought were cute. I would lock up, start sweating, and my English would resemble something like Dwarvish or Vulcan (yes, I just referenced two of the most geeky things ever!). Fear gripped me and for a long time got in the way of me being able to be friends with some really great people.
Dealing with success is simple. When we “succeed” we feel good about what we have accomplished and feel like we are worthwhile. But the truth is, we won’t always succeed. All of us will fail.
- What is something you have failed at recently? It doesn’t have to be major but take a minute and talk about something you’ve experienced failure with.
The thing is, we want to succeed. No one likes to fail and sometimes we do everything we can to avoid it. When I was in high school I didn’t try out for the basketball team because I was afraid I would get cut. So I didn’t even try out. In fact, I even bailed on a friend who had asked me for a ride home. I was that scared! Have you ever avoided something you wanted to do because you were afraid you wouldn’t succeed? How about not doing something because you were afraid you would disappoint someone? I was so fearful I ran away.
Running away is a terrible strategy. Running away doesn’t do you any good, the fear is still there. If you run away from trying out for the team you will miss out on enjoying the sport as well as making new friends and creating new memories. If you run away from learning that instrument you will not know what it feels like to create music yourself. If you run away from singing out loud you miss the opportunity to share the voice God gave you with others. If you run away from running for student government you miss the opportunity to lead and be part of a team that serves your class.
You see, if you run away or let fear stop you, you risk never succeeding. In order to succeed you have to take a risk.
I saw a commercial years ago with Michael Jordan (the best basketball player ever) that really illustrates what I’m trying to say. Check it out.
If we are going to be who God really wants us to be we need to learn what failure is and what it is not.
In the Bible, the book of Numbers has a great story about fear and failure. It takes place after the Israelites have escaped Egypt and have wandered around the desert. They are trying to establish who they are and God has promised to give them this land. So they send twelve men to spy out the land and see how it looks. When they get back to the people they give this report:
“We went into the land to which you sent us, and it does flow with milk and honey! Here is its fruit. But the people who live there are powerful, and the cities are fortified and very large…we can’t attack those people; they are stronger than we are” (Numbers 13:27-31 NIV).
Uh-Oh! There are big people! But didn’t God promise to give them the land? He sure did. As soon as they saw the people who lived there they freaked out. And it gets worse. After they said that they told this to all the people:
“The land we explored devours those living in it. All the people we saw there are of great size. We saw the Nephilim there (the descendants of Anak come from the Nephilim). We seemed like grasshoppers in our own eyes, and we looked the same to them” (Numbers 13:32-33 NIV).
Now everyone is scared! The whole nation forgets what God wants them to do and wets their pants…all at the same time. Except for two of the spies. Joshua and Caleb try to calm the people down and encourage them. Caleb ignores the other spies and tells them, “We should go up and take possession of the land, for we can certainly do it!” (Number 13:30 NIV). Then Joshua tries to remind them what they have been told:
The land we passed through and explored is exceedingly good. If the Lord is pleased with us, he will lead us into that land, a land flowing with milk and honey, and will give it to us. Only do not rebel against the Lord. And do not be afraid of the people of the land, because we will swallow them up. Their protection is gone, but the Lord is with us. Do not be afraid of them” (Numbers 14:7-9 NIV).
Later on the whole nation says, “I wish I had” because they wandered around the desert for 40 years. The only ones who survived long enough to actually go into the land were Joshua and Caleb and they both got to say, “I’m glad I did.”
Fear blocks what God wants. Fear gets in the way and keeps us from doing great things. Fear tells us not to take risks because we might not succeed. God wants you to know that He is with you and He will give you the courage to do whatever it is that He has called you to. So sing loud, run fast, try out for that team, be honest with your parents, live courageously! You don’t have to be afraid of failing because God is with you! You won’t always “succeed” in everything you do, but in the process you will discover the life God wants you to have.
Here are some questions for you to consider:
- What are some areas of your life where failure is possible? Do you embrace or shy away from those areas?
- What is the difference between courage and fear?
- Joshua and Caleb saw the same thing as the other spies. Why was there response different?
- Name one area where you need God to give you more courage.